It’s so easy to do. You scroll past someone’s holiday photos, notice the woman next to you lifting heavier weights, or remember how you looked ten years ago, and suddenly you feel like you’re falling behind. If you want to stop comparing yourself to everyone else and start enjoying your own journey, this one is for you. Comparison is completely human, but it can quietly steal your motivation and your joy if you let it.
Why We Compare (and Why It Doesn’t Help)
When we compare, we’re usually putting our everyday, behind-the-scenes life next to someone else’s highlights. We don’t see their struggles, their bad days or what else is going on at home. We only see the bit they choose to share, or the moment we happen to catch.
And the person we’re often hardest on? Our younger self. Your body at 45 or 55 has lived a lot of life. It may have carried babies, coped with stress, worked hard and kept going through it all. It deserves respect, not a constant comparison with how things used to be.
How to Stop Comparing Yourself, One Small Step at a Time
You won’t switch off comparison overnight, but you can gently loosen its grip. Here are a few things our ladies have found helpful:
- Notice it. When that “she’s doing better than me” thought pops up, simply notice it. You don’t have to believe it.
- Tidy your feed. If certain accounts always leave you feeling rubbish, it’s absolutely fine to mute or unfollow them.
- Measure against you. Ask, “Am I doing a little better than I was last month?” That’s the only comparison that really counts.
- Turn envy into curiosity. If someone inspires you, ask them what helped. Most women are only too happy to share.
Celebrate Wins That Have Nothing to Do With the Scales
Progress isn’t just a number. It’s climbing the stairs without feeling puffed out, sleeping a bit better, lifting your shopping with ease, or simply turning up on a morning when you really didn’t fancy it. Try writing down one win at the end of each week, however small. Over time you’ll have a lovely record of how far you’ve come, and it’s very hard to feel like you’re failing when it’s all there in black and white.
Find Your People
One of the things I love most about our studios is the way the ladies lift each other up. In a small group, there’s no showing off and no judgement, just women cheering each other on, whatever their starting point. When you’re surrounded by that kind of support, it becomes so much easier to focus on your own progress and celebrate everyone else’s too.
Be the Friend You Need
Next time you catch yourself in the comparison trap, ask yourself what you’d say to a friend who was feeling the same. I’d bet it would be something kind. You deserve that same kindness from yourself.
Try it out loud if you need to. Swap “I’m so behind” for “I’m learning, and I’m getting stronger every week.” Swap “I’ll never look like her” for “I’m proud of what my body can do today.” It might feel a little awkward at first, but the way you speak to yourself really does shape how you feel, and how likely you are to keep going.
Your Journey, Your Pace
If you’d love to focus on you for a while, with coaches and a group of women who get it, our 28-Day Challenge is the perfect place to start. Come as you are, go at your own pace, and let’s celebrate every single step together.
Have a wonderful weekend, ladies.
Alex x